In my 20s I lived on an island in Maine and studied ecology surrounded by haar. At night the borealis blessed the sky. Being pathologically curious I learned their mechanics but still regret knowing - like a child with no presents left to open. Science is valuable and yet as Oliver said we live with mysteries too marvelous to be understood. To keep our distance from those who think they have the answers. (Mysteries, Yes). I am finishing medical social work training and spent the year in oncology struck by this. A cancer clinic is a temple to science yet again and again I see patients benefit as much from empathy as chemo. Thank you for another Sunday morning treat.
There is something magic in the unknowing, isn't there? And I am so struck by your observations at the cancer clinic. Minds are powerful things, with material impact on a body and on the world... and sometimes, I think, we underestimate the power of the things we have always known and that are hard, if not impossible to truly measure - love, empathy, hope...
This is entrancing Rebecca. I have not experienced the Haar, but my imagination is dreaming its wonder up in my mind. I think perhaps part 2 of my Earth Day story might include it.. after reading this, I wonder if drawing and writing might feel like being lost within it. I often need to be called back from the disorienting space I have been lost within, by the sound of a metaphorical periwinkle whistle of family and home. I have believed for most of my life in the empirical, but in this latest decade of my life, I have found a different level of understanding, and although I do not believe magic is real, I also know that it is. Thank you for writing so beautifully week after week, and giving me more evidence to know that it is.
I wonder how many people who are empirically minded have this small unravelling of their worldview as they age, and why that is. Wisdom, hope, fear... But then, children seem exquisitely able to find magic and to accept an immaterial layer to this world.
Perhaps we are born unravelled and only start to ravel as we move away from childhood, by the world, by others, by the empirical. aAnd then, those of us that visit the haar, and get lost in it, begin unravelling again… and begin to believe in magic again ✨
The extremes...the cosiness of home, the unknown of the haar. Science, religion, Fleabag, Douglas Adams. The whole essay was magical and full of light.
What beautiful writing about such profound questions. This life, this world, thick with mystery. The faith it’s all measurable might just be pure hubris.
Thank you Julie! I used to call myself an atheist, absolutely certain of my stance, but I have since come to think of almost any sort of certainty as hubris... we live and we grow :)
Rebecca, I relate deeply and, similar to you, after a lifetime of training in skeptic materialism, find that wonder matters more than knowing even if it leaves me in a constant state of uncertainty. And at the end, how do you measure the bodysense of smelling warm bread or joyous magic of wagging tails? Thanks for sharing your beautiful words.
Rebecca, I always wait (im)patiently for your words. Your writing fills a deep well within me, and I often find myself nodding my head while reading your words (thoughts). I saw what would probably be the haar while on vacation in Eastern Québec years ago. Sitting on a picnic bench and suddenly seeing a huge white, not cloud, nor wall, but more of an opaque curtain, come slowly towards me and eventually envelope me. It was a strange site to see and a strange feeling.
To quesion any part of our academic studies or even our basic beliefs is ''...to question a philosophy you have built your whole life upon, your whole belief system around, is — to put it simply — terrifying.'' When a dear friend and colleague developed amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (a horrid, fatal disease), considering that she had lived her life following the most fundamental and natural mode of living; eating well, walking and meditating daily; I was questioning all of my naturopathic studies and practices, which have always been a big part of my life and my family's. It was terrifying and blinding-I kept asking myself at that time, that no matter what one does, or how one lives, does it make a difference, really?
Science is definitelty valuable, and I believe there is more...more to know...more of what we may never comprehend.
Thank you for this wonderful comment, Jeannine. I did worry when writing these thoughts that some might think I am saying science isn't valuable - but of course it is, in so many ways. But there is value to questioning if everything in the world can be measured, isn't there? And these questions seem especially pertinent when we are faced with our own mortality, as in the case of the loss of your dear friend x
This is so beautiful. Thank you for offering me some powerful writing and lovely existential ideas with my morning coffee ❤️
It’s funny how when we take a step back to look at the dogmas we carry (mine tend to be found in psychology) then a good honest reflection on what is true vs what feels aligned with our core my shake our very foundations. I feel like I get sucked into scientific fact and measurement but I’ve always found a good qualitative study to be much more profound. When so much is unknown, maybe all we have is story?
I do think there is so much truth in that, Bennett! Stories for so long were the only way we had to make sense of this world, and maybe still they are all we have - only now they are rooted in the muddy mix of measurement as well as culture and whatever baggage it is we each carry. I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, and thank you for commenting.
Beautiful words and beautiful ideas. Thank you for sharing these thoughts in such a great piece of writing. As a materialist who doesn't believe in matter, I think you're right! We can easily become concrete in our thinking, become result and measurement-focused, but it's the exploration that matters more. It's the exploration out of which we construct meaning. Your friend in Toronto was an interesting person!
Oh, she was one of the wisest and kindest people I have known. It's a rare sort of person who is constantly exploring their own reality and reaches a hand to bring others along, too, especially when so young!
Thankyou for another interesting and engaging essay - anchored in the physicality of your island home but touching on matters universal.
Sea fogs are very rare on the coast here but I watched one roll in over the coast a few years ago and I walked along a rocky shore delighting in the event. The Haar is a wonderful metaphor to build your thoughts around.
I have an enormous respect for and interest in all forms of Science. Scientific Rationalism is a powerful tool for understanding the universe and I see no problem at all in "measuring" whatever we can measure, and developing mathematics which can help us understand the order - and disorder - we see around us.
But of course I am also a Poet, and I would not be such if I thought that Scientific Rationalism can "explain" everything.
Consciousness is indeed a deep mystery, and there are so many more. I think every "Scientist" needs to have a sense of wonder, as you so clearly do...
In some ways I think poets and scientists are two sides of the same coin. Both curious, both in love with the world, both digging as deep as they can. But then, poets are the experts in questioning and scientists in measuring. Perhaps both sides have something to learn from the other. Ah, I'm so glad you have experienced a haar! They are just magical.
Such gorgeous writing. I love the mystery and mysticism that remains in this world no matter how much we try to explain. I am not a science denier per se but have discovered in my own life how limiting and rigid it can be, just like religion as your friend pointed out. This was beautiful. Thank you. ❤️
On old maps, at the dividing line between land that was known and unknown, cartographers sometimes wrote "Here there be dragons".
Every good scientist I know admits there is a boundary beyond which our senses and instruments cannot see (yet). But to assume that means there is a non-material ("magical") zone beyond the world of natural phenomena seems unnecessary, even if rather enchanting!
I love 'here there be dragons'! But I'm not sure I agree that considering a world beyond the measurable is unnecessary... even if the whole world and everything within can be measured, isn't there value is questioning it, in taking the thought experiment of immeasurable facets of the universe as far as it can go until we are more sure of the reality we live within? I have come to think that there is always value in questioning the constructs of the reality we think we know :)
I think we are all free to think of the unknown in whatever way we like. My problem is with people who refuse to learn what we DO know and instead hold tight to their fact-free opinions and beliefs.
Oh I couldn't agree with you more there! One of the arguments against exploring non-materialist philosophies is that it opens the door to pseudoscience, a place we most certainly do not want to go… I don't see an easy way to open one door and keep the other firmly closed, so I have some sympathy with this argument.
I like this quote from E.O. Wilson that allows for wide conjecture even in science as long as it ultimately submits to some legitimate scrutiny:
“The most successful scientist thinks like a poet — wide-ranging, sometimes fantastical — and works like a bookkeeper. It is the latter role that the world sees.”
What beautiful, beautiful and gently provocative writing this is, as always. I trained as, and worked as a chemical engineer for 20 years and then followed a lifelong itch to become an artist, retraining in ceramics and expressing creativity (where does creativity come from?) My work is an expression of the tension of opposites, as life I think is. I have spent much time recently thinking about how constructs rule our lives (time being a big one) and now I have your writing to expand and deepen my thinking. Thank you. I feel more alive every time I listen to one of your pieces.
Oh Julie thank you, this is such a lovely thing to read. I am so glad my writing connects with you. And it is such a good question you pose - where creativity comes from. Sometimes I feel it comes from something beyond the self, although I recently read a study that found creative people to have more 'subconscious connectivity' in the brain, which would suggest almost the opposite. In some ways I hope it remains a wonderful, tangled mystery, just so we get to carry on exploring :) x PS your work sounds so interesting - 'the tension of opposites'!!
I always thought of myself as a realist, dust to dust, nothing more. Now, I, too, since I have grown closer to its inevitability, hope that death is not such a final thing. So much to explore, so little time. Glad I clicked on this for my morning read, Rebecca. ~J Will share.
So glad you enjoyed it Janice - and yes! so much to explore, and life is just too short to get a grip on it all (...and perhaps our minds too small to in any case!) x
In my 20s I lived on an island in Maine and studied ecology surrounded by haar. At night the borealis blessed the sky. Being pathologically curious I learned their mechanics but still regret knowing - like a child with no presents left to open. Science is valuable and yet as Oliver said we live with mysteries too marvelous to be understood. To keep our distance from those who think they have the answers. (Mysteries, Yes). I am finishing medical social work training and spent the year in oncology struck by this. A cancer clinic is a temple to science yet again and again I see patients benefit as much from empathy as chemo. Thank you for another Sunday morning treat.
There is something magic in the unknowing, isn't there? And I am so struck by your observations at the cancer clinic. Minds are powerful things, with material impact on a body and on the world... and sometimes, I think, we underestimate the power of the things we have always known and that are hard, if not impossible to truly measure - love, empathy, hope...
Yes, yes, yes.
This is entrancing Rebecca. I have not experienced the Haar, but my imagination is dreaming its wonder up in my mind. I think perhaps part 2 of my Earth Day story might include it.. after reading this, I wonder if drawing and writing might feel like being lost within it. I often need to be called back from the disorienting space I have been lost within, by the sound of a metaphorical periwinkle whistle of family and home. I have believed for most of my life in the empirical, but in this latest decade of my life, I have found a different level of understanding, and although I do not believe magic is real, I also know that it is. Thank you for writing so beautifully week after week, and giving me more evidence to know that it is.
I wonder how many people who are empirically minded have this small unravelling of their worldview as they age, and why that is. Wisdom, hope, fear... But then, children seem exquisitely able to find magic and to accept an immaterial layer to this world.
Perhaps we are born unravelled and only start to ravel as we move away from childhood, by the world, by others, by the empirical. aAnd then, those of us that visit the haar, and get lost in it, begin unravelling again… and begin to believe in magic again ✨
The extremes...the cosiness of home, the unknown of the haar. Science, religion, Fleabag, Douglas Adams. The whole essay was magical and full of light.
Oh thank you Wendy!
What beautiful writing about such profound questions. This life, this world, thick with mystery. The faith it’s all measurable might just be pure hubris.
Thank you Julie! I used to call myself an atheist, absolutely certain of my stance, but I have since come to think of almost any sort of certainty as hubris... we live and we grow :)
Rebecca, I relate deeply and, similar to you, after a lifetime of training in skeptic materialism, find that wonder matters more than knowing even if it leaves me in a constant state of uncertainty. And at the end, how do you measure the bodysense of smelling warm bread or joyous magic of wagging tails? Thanks for sharing your beautiful words.
Yes!!! Exactly this. And I love "bodysense". What a perfect word to encapsulate the experience of being embodied.
Rebecca, I always wait (im)patiently for your words. Your writing fills a deep well within me, and I often find myself nodding my head while reading your words (thoughts). I saw what would probably be the haar while on vacation in Eastern Québec years ago. Sitting on a picnic bench and suddenly seeing a huge white, not cloud, nor wall, but more of an opaque curtain, come slowly towards me and eventually envelope me. It was a strange site to see and a strange feeling.
To quesion any part of our academic studies or even our basic beliefs is ''...to question a philosophy you have built your whole life upon, your whole belief system around, is — to put it simply — terrifying.'' When a dear friend and colleague developed amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (a horrid, fatal disease), considering that she had lived her life following the most fundamental and natural mode of living; eating well, walking and meditating daily; I was questioning all of my naturopathic studies and practices, which have always been a big part of my life and my family's. It was terrifying and blinding-I kept asking myself at that time, that no matter what one does, or how one lives, does it make a difference, really?
Science is definitelty valuable, and I believe there is more...more to know...more of what we may never comprehend.
Thank you for this wonderful comment, Jeannine. I did worry when writing these thoughts that some might think I am saying science isn't valuable - but of course it is, in so many ways. But there is value to questioning if everything in the world can be measured, isn't there? And these questions seem especially pertinent when we are faced with our own mortality, as in the case of the loss of your dear friend x
This is so beautiful. Thank you for offering me some powerful writing and lovely existential ideas with my morning coffee ❤️
It’s funny how when we take a step back to look at the dogmas we carry (mine tend to be found in psychology) then a good honest reflection on what is true vs what feels aligned with our core my shake our very foundations. I feel like I get sucked into scientific fact and measurement but I’ve always found a good qualitative study to be much more profound. When so much is unknown, maybe all we have is story?
I do think there is so much truth in that, Bennett! Stories for so long were the only way we had to make sense of this world, and maybe still they are all we have - only now they are rooted in the muddy mix of measurement as well as culture and whatever baggage it is we each carry. I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, and thank you for commenting.
Thank you for your wonderful and memorable image of haar as snow leopard, just perfect…
Thank you, Mari!
Beautiful words and beautiful ideas. Thank you for sharing these thoughts in such a great piece of writing. As a materialist who doesn't believe in matter, I think you're right! We can easily become concrete in our thinking, become result and measurement-focused, but it's the exploration that matters more. It's the exploration out of which we construct meaning. Your friend in Toronto was an interesting person!
Oh, she was one of the wisest and kindest people I have known. It's a rare sort of person who is constantly exploring their own reality and reaches a hand to bring others along, too, especially when so young!
Once, I took a late night walk in deep mist. The memory of it has never left me. Beautiful writing, as always.
Oh that sounds wonderful. I'm so glad you enjoyed the piece, Oonagh.
Hi Rebecca
Thankyou for another interesting and engaging essay - anchored in the physicality of your island home but touching on matters universal.
Sea fogs are very rare on the coast here but I watched one roll in over the coast a few years ago and I walked along a rocky shore delighting in the event. The Haar is a wonderful metaphor to build your thoughts around.
I have an enormous respect for and interest in all forms of Science. Scientific Rationalism is a powerful tool for understanding the universe and I see no problem at all in "measuring" whatever we can measure, and developing mathematics which can help us understand the order - and disorder - we see around us.
But of course I am also a Poet, and I would not be such if I thought that Scientific Rationalism can "explain" everything.
Consciousness is indeed a deep mystery, and there are so many more. I think every "Scientist" needs to have a sense of wonder, as you so clearly do...
Best Wishes - Dave :)
In some ways I think poets and scientists are two sides of the same coin. Both curious, both in love with the world, both digging as deep as they can. But then, poets are the experts in questioning and scientists in measuring. Perhaps both sides have something to learn from the other. Ah, I'm so glad you have experienced a haar! They are just magical.
Such gorgeous writing. I love the mystery and mysticism that remains in this world no matter how much we try to explain. I am not a science denier per se but have discovered in my own life how limiting and rigid it can be, just like religion as your friend pointed out. This was beautiful. Thank you. ❤️
I'm so glad it connected with you! Yes, any rigid worldview is probably limited isn't it? The key is to keep questioning.
On old maps, at the dividing line between land that was known and unknown, cartographers sometimes wrote "Here there be dragons".
Every good scientist I know admits there is a boundary beyond which our senses and instruments cannot see (yet). But to assume that means there is a non-material ("magical") zone beyond the world of natural phenomena seems unnecessary, even if rather enchanting!
I love 'here there be dragons'! But I'm not sure I agree that considering a world beyond the measurable is unnecessary... even if the whole world and everything within can be measured, isn't there value is questioning it, in taking the thought experiment of immeasurable facets of the universe as far as it can go until we are more sure of the reality we live within? I have come to think that there is always value in questioning the constructs of the reality we think we know :)
I think we are all free to think of the unknown in whatever way we like. My problem is with people who refuse to learn what we DO know and instead hold tight to their fact-free opinions and beliefs.
Oh I couldn't agree with you more there! One of the arguments against exploring non-materialist philosophies is that it opens the door to pseudoscience, a place we most certainly do not want to go… I don't see an easy way to open one door and keep the other firmly closed, so I have some sympathy with this argument.
I like this quote from E.O. Wilson that allows for wide conjecture even in science as long as it ultimately submits to some legitimate scrutiny:
“The most successful scientist thinks like a poet — wide-ranging, sometimes fantastical — and works like a bookkeeper. It is the latter role that the world sees.”
I used that quote to introduce my PhD thesis 😊 one of my favourites.
'Here there be dragons'--perfect.
Thanks Leslie!
I love the way you use the immaterial haar to think through the question of how much we value measuring things. Great piec, thank you.
Thank you Ruth, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
What beautiful, beautiful and gently provocative writing this is, as always. I trained as, and worked as a chemical engineer for 20 years and then followed a lifelong itch to become an artist, retraining in ceramics and expressing creativity (where does creativity come from?) My work is an expression of the tension of opposites, as life I think is. I have spent much time recently thinking about how constructs rule our lives (time being a big one) and now I have your writing to expand and deepen my thinking. Thank you. I feel more alive every time I listen to one of your pieces.
Oh Julie thank you, this is such a lovely thing to read. I am so glad my writing connects with you. And it is such a good question you pose - where creativity comes from. Sometimes I feel it comes from something beyond the self, although I recently read a study that found creative people to have more 'subconscious connectivity' in the brain, which would suggest almost the opposite. In some ways I hope it remains a wonderful, tangled mystery, just so we get to carry on exploring :) x PS your work sounds so interesting - 'the tension of opposites'!!
I always thought of myself as a realist, dust to dust, nothing more. Now, I, too, since I have grown closer to its inevitability, hope that death is not such a final thing. So much to explore, so little time. Glad I clicked on this for my morning read, Rebecca. ~J Will share.
So glad you enjoyed it Janice - and yes! so much to explore, and life is just too short to get a grip on it all (...and perhaps our minds too small to in any case!) x